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Agents Say The Darndest Things!

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Still here [Feb. 1st, 2007|02:01 am]
Agents Say The Darndest Things!
jenniferjames
[mood |tiredtired]

Still trying to find an agent. I got a really neat book for Christmas. It's in my car right now, but I think the title is something like, "For Short Story & Novel Writers" and it basically gives you the do's and don'ts of trying to break into the literary game. There's also a pretty extensive list of agents. I plan to blow the dust off my query letter and send out another round of letters when time permits.

2007 is gonna be my year. I can just feel it. =)
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Still breathing [Aug. 26th, 2006|06:23 pm]
Agents Say The Darndest Things!
jenniferjames
[mood |tiredtired]

Hello, ducks. I've been busier than a one legged man in a butt kicking contest. (Soda and a bag of chips if you can figure out what movie that line is from.)

Did you all fear that I received a positive response to one of my queries and had abandoned the community? Well, rest easy. I'm still firmly lodged in the ranks of the have-nots, as evidenced by my latest round of rejects.

David Black Literary AgencyCollapse )

Anderson Grinberg Literary Management, Inc.Collapse )

Lisa Davis Literary AgencyCollapse )

Sterling Lord Literistic, Inc.Collapse )
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Happy Friday, ducks. [Jul. 14th, 2006|07:57 pm]
Agents Say The Darndest Things!
jenniferjames
[mood |numbTGIF]

Jennifer:

Thank you for giving me the opportunity to consider your project, but I think I'm going to pass. My decision is based largely upon my current work load and the fact that I handle only a limited range of commercial fiction, rather than the merits of your project.

Elaine P. English
Elaine P. English, PLLC
4710 41st Street, NW, Suite D
Washington, DC 20016


I *heart* email rejection letters. They make me feel all warm and snuggly.
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Regrouping [Jul. 9th, 2006|07:46 am]
Agents Say The Darndest Things!
jenniferjames
[mood |hopefulhopeful]

So.

I decided to revamp my query after the latest round of reject letters. The new and improved query falls just a hair short of telling the prospective agents I've written the next great masterpiece and they would be fools to pass up the chance to represent me.

O_o

Well. Modesty wasn't working so I figured I'd try the other thing.

We shall see.
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Save the trees. [Jun. 28th, 2006|06:02 pm]
Agents Say The Darndest Things!
jenniferjames
[mood |blah"Whatever."]

Got another rejection letter today. Actually, what I got was a note scribbled across the top left corner of the query letter I sent. I'm going to assume this person is just extremely conscientious about the environment and didn't want to waste paper composing an actual letter in response to my query.

Letter was sent to:

Ayesha Pande
Lyons & Pande International, L.L.C.
55 West 116th Street, Suite 314
New York, New York 10026

Reply:

Dear Ms. James -

Thanks for your query, but this doesn't fit my list at this time.

Best of luck.
Ayesha Pande


Uh huh.

Well, I'm off. Have to hunt down more agents to query.
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I needn't have worried. [Jun. 26th, 2006|07:27 pm]
Agents Say The Darndest Things!
jenniferjames
[mood |hungryhungry]

242 East Fifth Street
New York, New York 10003
212.979.0880

MARY EVANS INC.

Dear Author,

Thank you very much for thinking of Mary Evans Inc. Unfortunately, after careful consideration we have determined that your material is not quite right for us.

We apologize for the impersonal response. Given the large number of queries and manuscripts we receive every week, we are unable to reply to each submission individually.

Thanks again for giving us the opportunity to consider your work and we wish you the best of luck.

Sincerely,
Carlotta Vance


We apologize for the impersonal response.

If I had a dollar...

after careful consideration

So careful, in fact, that they addressed their response to "Dear Author". Riiiight.

****


Writers House LLC
21 W. 26th Street
New York, N.Y. 10010
212.685.2400

June 20, 2006

Jennifer James
123 Easy Street
Bump, Texas 12345

Dear Jennifer James,

Thanks for sending your query letter for THE DOG ATE MY HOMEWORK, but I don't think I'm the right agent for your work. I wish you the best of luck in your search for representation.

Sincerely,
Maya Rock


This chick has a quick response time. How novel. =)

cut for courtesyCollapse )
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This n' that -- June 18, 2006 [Jun. 18th, 2006|10:19 pm]
Agents Say The Darndest Things!
jenniferjames
[mood |sleepysleepy]

I want to shout out to all the dads in the hiz-ouse. Happy Father's Day, yo!

A week has come and gone with no reject letters. Call me nuts, but I'm vaguely distressed by this.

I saw my 9th grade English teacher at church today (our father's attend the same church and we were both visiting for Dad's Day) and she told me how proud she is of me. This means a lot because she's really the first person I remember asking, "Have you ever thought of being a writer?" I sent her an autographed copy of my manuscript a couple of months ago. She said she's gonna auction it on Ebay when I blow up. That was nice to hear. =)

Nothing much else to report folks. Oh! I was flipping channels yesterday and there was something on E! (I think) about how Anne Rice didn't want Tom Cruise in Interview With A Vampire. She eventually came around and even took a full page ad in Variety saying that she'd been wrong and that he was perfect in the part (*insert vomit here*). That got me to thinking. How much influence does a writer really have over casting when their work is adapted for the screen?

I have very definite pictures of my characters in my head. When you live with these images for so long (six years in my case), it's gotta be pretty hard to reconcile yourself to seeing anyone other than the person you visualized play the part. I get the feeling most of the time writers are made to feel they should just shut up and be happy someone is interested in making a movie of their work. I imagine this must be especially true for unknowns, but I wonder if more established writers actually are able to influence casting.

So much for me not having much else to say, eh? ;)

I can barely keep my beady eyes open. Time to shut it down.

Peace.
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Hee. [Jun. 18th, 2006|01:06 am]
Agents Say The Darndest Things!
jenniferjames
[mood |amusedamused]

Sign me up!

Check's in the mail. Cross my heart. ;)
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20 Worst Agents [Jun. 12th, 2006|08:46 pm]
Agents Say The Darndest Things!
jenniferjames
[mood |relievedWhew!]

Writer Beware!

Dude. I queried Barbara Bauer.

*shiver*

ETA: Just checked the binder I keep my reject letters in. I queried Barbara Braun.
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Form letters: "When you care enough to send the very best." [Jun. 10th, 2006|09:25 pm]
Agents Say The Darndest Things!
jenniferjames
[mood |tiredtired]

2M Communications Ltd.
121 West 27th Street
Suite 601
New York, NY 10001

Dear Author:

Thank you for giving us the opportunity to consider your work. Unfortunately, we do not feel enthusiastic enough about the project to be able to pursue it further.

As I'm sure you can imagine, we receive a tremendous number of submissions on a daily basis and are forced to limit our focus. Agenting is a very subjective business and, even though we could not take on your project at this time, another agent might feel differently.

Please forgive this rather impersonal response, but we would prefer that you know our feelings as soon as possible rather than leaving you to wait for a personal letter.

Our best wishes for success in your writing career.

Yours sincerely,
Madeleine Morel

****

Please forgive this rather impersonal response, but we would prefer that you know our feelings as soon as possible rather than leaving you to wait for a personal letter.

Because an impersonal 'buzz off' is always so much better than a personal 'get lost'.

O_o

You gotta love these folks.
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